Am I being prepared for better things???

I wish I was a neutron bomb, for once I could go off

I wish I was a sacrifice but somehow still lived on

I wish I was a sentimental ornament you hung on

The Christmas tree, I wish I was the star that went on top

I wish I was the evidence,

I wish I was the groundsFor 50 million hands upraised and open toward the sky

I wish I was a sailor with someone who waited for me

I wish I was as fortunate, as fortunate as me

I wish I was a messenger and all the news was good

I wish I was the full moon shining off a camaro’s hood

I wish I was an alien at home behind the sun

I wish I was the souvenir you kept your house key on

I wish I was the pedal brake that you depended on

I wish I was the verb ’to trust’ and never let you

I wish... I wish..

There are a lot of things I wish I could be, but unfortunately my wishes are just wishes till date. Again, sitting here at work, don’t know what to do, waiting for a meeting to decide if they let me keep this job!!! Downsizing and lay off’s are something which I have been living with for the last to months… thanks to the dumb, lick ass team my manager hired when I was not around, when I was working for a different project for a while!

My salary is not credited completely…that’s another pain, keeping in mind all the loans I got to pay…not a great part of the year. August is always never fine for me, last august I was in the same phase when i worked for proton web, year before with Ajuba Solutions, Year before with Maple Thoughts… anyways my job hunt is on like crazy.

There are two things I encounter when I give interviews… 1) Over qualified to just be a trainer 2) no requirement 3) cannot match salary. So I need to work on a mediocre resume to get myself a job, godamnit, I know I would be under employed, but I need a job so give it to me.

I cleared an interview with a small company and was about to collect my offer, but I declined it…don’t know why!!! May be I should have at least taken it for the worst case scenario. Cleared two rounds of interview with GE is the only consolation.

What so ever I’m not going to bog down, I will fight, it’s a tough situation but I will never get myself an under paid or under employed job and I am stern about the decision. I will never compromise on my self esteem; I will never, irrespective of what my mom says, my bro says, who so ever it may be.

Let me see how things work out for me… I firmly believe that I’m going through this because I am being prepared for better things in life…